Parents write to me about what's happening in their houses — the slammed door, the phone fight, the agreement that lasted four days. I answer here, alongside notes from my own kitchen. Letters are shared anonymously, or first-name-only with permission.
Have one of your own? Send it at Ask Vida →
Everyone signs. The house feels different for four days. Then your teen tests it — and what you do in that moment decides whether the agreement survives.
Your teen looks grown and sounds grown. The part of them that governs reason, impulse and calm is still under construction — and knowing that changes how you lead.
Tone is processed faster than words. The same instruction, delivered two ways, produces two entirely different evenings.
Send me what is happening in your house. I choose one question at a time and work it through on the podcast — the situation, the words to say, and what to do when it gets tested. If I choose yours, I email you a week before it goes out.
Ask Vida — it's free